Mr. N. signed us up for the retreat and I was really excited to go. We were put up in a nice hotel, with free food, and free child care while we attended the retreat. Plus, on Saturday we got 7 hours of free child care for "date night". Parents, not just those with herds, need time to themselves as well so we can, well, regroup.
We arrived at the hotel and were put into a room with 2 beds. We are a big family, but we knew we could make it work. Luckily, the Chaplain was able to get us connecting rooms so that there was enough room for our clan. Awesome! We made the switch and then headed off to dinner before our first session started.
This particular retreat was based on the speakings and book "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage" by Mark Gungor (if you are interested in reading his book, taking one of his seminars, or just curious, go here)
We watched one of his marriage seminars on DVD. He talked about the differences between men and women (i.e. men store their thoughts in boxes and only take one box out at a time, usually their "nothing" box; while women's thoughts are all interconnected by "wires", which is why we have a difficult time thinking about nothing. Trust me, I've tried) It was very enlightening and I learned quite a bit the first night.
Saturday was the second session of the retreat and we all got complimentary copies of Mr. Gungor's books. Oh my word I was so excited about this! I love reading and getting new books. Not to mention, that Mr. N. and I "won" another (read: different) book for having the most children at the retreat. Thank you Herd :) I'm about half way through the book at this time, but so far I am enjoying it and learning quite a bit. Yay for reading.
Moving along...
Saturday night was our date night. However, I spent the first 2 hours of it at Urgent Care. Talk about a bummer. However, we did go out and have a nice dinner with our friends who were also at the retreat. After dinner we went back to the hotel and walked around Charlotte for a little bit before we had to return and pick the herd up from child care. It was a nice evening. We don't get a lot of alone time, but we also don't get a lot of time for spending with our friends (sans herd) so it was nice to have that opportunity.
The herd was loving the child care room. They played games, had snacks, did arts and crafts, watched movies. They didn't want to leave when we picked them up and were always excited to go back. They're too cute sometimes.
Sunday was the final day of the retreat and it was a wrap up session. We talked about what we learned. What I learned/took away from the retreat is that sometimes it is ok to "take", that Mr. N. really does have a "nothing" box, that more often than not you need to ask more than once if you would like him to get something done, that if I want something I need to ask for it, among a few other things. Upon leaving the retreat, I felt closer to Mr. N. It was a great experience and I loved that I got to share it with him.
While there will be many ups and downs in our lives and our marriage, as long as we are committed to our marriage and able to communicate to the best of our abilities, we can get through anything. Deployments are a reality for us and it makes it that much more important for us to be able to have good communication skills so that we can stay connected despite the distance.
For all of you MilSpouses out there who are reading this, if you haven't gone to a marriage retreat, I highly recommend it. It was amazing and I am so glad that we got the opportunity to go. I am hoping that this is something that we will get a chance to participate in again.
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